


Spiky thespians

by mimisdeliveryservice



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn, Falsettos - Lapine/Finn (Broadway Cast) RPF, RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Broadway, F/F, Partners to Lovers, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-08
Updated: 2018-05-08
Packaged: 2019-05-04 03:32:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14584038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimisdeliveryservice/pseuds/mimisdeliveryservice
Summary: Trixie Mattel dreams of getting her big break on Broadway. Instead she's reunited with Katya and they play lesbian lovers.





	Spiky thespians

**Author's Note:**

> I really wanted to post this before Andrew Rannels was a judge on drag race. So yeah, enjoy this crossover no one asked for.

Pre-Broadway  
Trixie Mattel sat anxiously in the waiting room. In her hands she held her song lyrics and the monologue she prepared. Although she knew them at heart, she was still nervous. Before she was either in small roles or in off- Broadway production. And now she was auditioning for the female lead in a Broadway musical. Take that people at home. She was checking her things- her resume looked good, after all she had dedicated so much of her life to theatre that she rarely had free time, her headshots were also very good, she remembered the day she got them done, she was so excited.  
" Trixie, Trixie Mattel?" she turned around a saw her former castmate.  
"Katya." And with that she hugged the Russian woman. " Thank God, there's someone I know here. So, who are you reading for?" Trixie asked  
" Cordelia. How about you?"  
" Trina. It's good that we're auditioning for different parts, now I won't have to shank you in the parking lot for getting the role. "  
" I thought you'd throw some beads on stage like in Showgirls."  
With that they both erupted in laughter. Even though their characters didn't have many interactions in " Heathers" those two had somehow developed a strong friendly bond.  
" Tracy Martel" called the announcer.  
" It's Trixie Mattel, but okay" said the blonde and waved to Katya, who was mouthing break a leg. It was time. She walked in the stage , introduced herself and began to sing. It was her favourite- a Dolly Parton song that she had been singing and rehearsing ever since she knew how to dance. Trixie also did her monologue, and by the time she left the audition she was confident that she scored the role. That confidence didn't fade in the weeks she was waiting for the callback, but to her disappointment it wasn't for Trina, but instead for doctor Charlotte. Trixie decided that the role was still worth trying out for, so she attended the callback, and low and behold, she got the role. She stared at the screen of her phone, still not believing that she was cast in a Broadway musical. 

A few hours after she had received the email she got a phone call from Katya.  
" I got Cordelia. Did you get Trina?"  
"No, but I got doctor Charlotte. "  
"Oh, sorry that you didn't get the part you were hoping for, but at least you're gonna be playing my lesbian lover. "  
"Wait, what. Really?"  
"Yes. Trixie Mattel if you're telling me that you've never seen Falsettos I'm coming over and smacking you with my lines."  
" I was 3 years old at time. Wait how did you see it when you were 10?"  
"Shit, sorry, sometimes I forget that you're still young. And it took a lot of convincing. I was the only kid who wanted to visit Broadway, not Disneyland. "  
" Trust me, you weren't. Okay, gotta go now, got lines to learn. "  
" Actually wait, can we do one rehearsal together before the whole thing starts? To kinda test out our chemistry and vocals. "  
" Okay, we can meet in that little coffee shop we used to go with the " Heathers" cast, you know the one on 50th Street. How about Thursday at 8"  
" Okay, it's a date."

That faithful morning arrived and the two women met again at " The Melody"- the name was part of the reason they chose it as a meet up place. It was like the coffee shop had remained unchanged- the same staff, the same menu, they even managed to score the same table as they used to. So after a bit of chit chat and two camomile teas it was time for an impromptu rehearsal.  
"Okay let's look at our songs now". And with that Katya pulled out her lines which she filled with highlighted et passages and little notes in her handwriting. She began to explain everything to Trixie, pointing out specific parts.  
"Falsettoland"- it's the first song. We gotta deliver there. So the spiky lesbians are remembered.  
Then we move on to "Year of the child", where it's mostly me.  
"The baseball game"- that's where we establish that we have a strong bond with both Marvin and Jason. Which will be important later on.  
"A day in falsettoland"- that's my favourite. It's the one with all the choreography. In it we really gotta play up the loving act.  
"Something bad is happening "- This is your big song. Also you know the trope that everything is worse in act 2? Yeah, this is where everything gets sad. So you must convey worry, all the while you're in a romantic duet with me and yet slay the high notes.  
"Cancelling the bar Mitzvah"- we gotta be me more solemn here, but at the same time it's kind of a preparation for the next song .  
"Unlikely lovers"- this is another big song. This is time where there shouldn't be a dry eye in the theater.  
And then we have some parts in the last few songs.  
"And with that we're finished. A whopping 11 minutes and 35 seconds of content. "  
" Okay, there's no way you know that. "  
" I took my cast album and wrote down how long each " spiky lesbians" part is."  
" And for my entire life I thought I was the biggest musical theater nerd around. Which brings me to a question I've always wanted to ask you Katya, why do you always audition for the smaller roles. In " Heathers" you could've easily played Heather Chandler and now you could've auditioned for Trina."  
" I don't think that the larger roles are more important than the other ones. In the end the most important thing is the audience- if you did a good job, they'll remember you, no matter what you played. And also I want to have fun on stage. And of course having a good duet partner. " after that she booped Trixie's nose.  
" Okay, save that for the future interviews."  
And she did. Even before the show premiered Trixie and Katya were liked, and their chemistry was undeniable thanks to their interviews and the sneak peak of " Unlikely lovers".  
For months and months the two blonde women rehearsed along their co-stars. All the sleepless nights, muscle pain and sore throats lead to this fateful night- September 29th 2016.

Broadway

It was opening night. But instead of being backstage with her cast mates Trixie Mattel was throwing up in the bathroom. Then she heard a knock on the door followed by the words:  
" Hey, it's Katya. Can you open the door?"  
And when she did just that she was immediately hugged by the Russian.  
" It's okay. I know you're nervous. We all have our ways to calm down- I chain-smoke and you throw up. But do you remember "Heathers"? The audience loved us, you. And I can honestly say that the way you sang " Kindergarten boyfriend" gave me chills. That's when I knew I wanted to sing with you. Okay, sappy moment over, will you be able to calm down if we did our first number?"  
Trixie just nodded, too stunned by Katya's words to talk to her.  
They started from the first line  
" Spiky lesbians"  
" Women internists"  
" Shiksa caterer"  
" Okay, we're good. ". All that was left to do was wait. And wait they did. The minutes passed slowly but it the intermission was finally over. That's when Brendon went up on stage.  
" Homosexuals, women with children..." . Trixie was in a trance of some sorts but she felt Katya' s hard but reassuring squeeze of her hand.  
" March, march of the Falsettos" that's when everyone turned around and Trixie and Katya made their first appearance. The crowd went wild. Trixie smiled and sang the first line  
" Spiky lesbians". That was the first of many times she wanted to cry on that stage.  
The second time she almost cried was on " Something bad is happening". Her character was flipping through a magazine and she began singing:  
" People might say I'm very dyke-ish  
I make a big stink when I must, but goddamn  
I'm just professional, never too nonchalant  
If I'm a bitch, well, I am what I am!"  
Those lyrics, it was like they were written for her. She never hid her attraction to women, and was a big activist for equality. And she was also too ambitious for her own good. She always strived for the top roles, the big songs and she would crush anyone who stood between her and her success. And that's why that song was so special to her- it was her big Broadway debut. So she channeled all her years of vocal training and put them in this solo.  
" Something bad is spreading,spreading, spreading 'round!". That's when Katya cut in. When Trixie looked at her, it was like she had just won a Tony. It wasn't unusual to develop a crush on your on-stage partner. Maybe if things went well with the musical she'd ask the Russian out. But for now she was fine as playing her lover.  
But Trixie's composure finally cracked at " Unlikely lovers". Despite Whizzer being only a fictional character for the cast he was more than that. They were like a little family and it was like they were losing Andrew instead of his character. The emotion in their voices, the overall mood of the stage and the reality of the situation made this song all the more heartbreaking. Well, it turns out that crying was good for your voice. From then on it was almost always silent tears and Schmaltz for Trixie, even if she wasn't on stage. To be fair everyone cried at " What would I do". After that it was the end of the show, the еnd of the two hour emotional rollercoaster. Her first major Broadway show, the audience's sudden exposure to her, it was all exhausting and all she wanted to do is take a 6 hour nap, but instead of that she got a wild cast party. Who knew that musical theatre nerds could down this much vodka in one night. By the end of the party she was in the backseat of a taxi with Katya, both of them on the verge of passing out. But when it came time for the Russian to get off, she did the most unexpected thing . She kissed Trixie's cheek and then whispered in her ear.  
" Hey, I know that you'll probably think that I'm too drunk to think properly but I really fucking like you and I want us to go out on a date. Call me if you remember this tomorow. "  
And that's how Trixie Mattel scored not only a role in a musical, but also a girlfriend.

Post-Broadway  
"There's no way she's nominated for a Tony and we're just here. I can't believe it. That could've been me. What does Stephanie have that I don't?"  
"Drop it, sweetheart  
Give it up  
You know I love you  
What's the matter, Trixie darling?  
I don't get it  
Why can't you let go?"  
" That's not funny Katya. I'm serious. This was the opportunity of a lifetime for me and I missed it. "  
" You're talking as if you're never get a Tony, sweetheart. And I'm sure you will. And for now at least you'll have a smoking hot date for the Tonys."  
" You're right. I mean look at us - we're talented, we are performing at the biggest musical theatre awards and we're doing it together. "

Post- post Broadway  
And we're here tonight with Broadway's top couple . Those two sweethearts met on the stage and tonight they'll perform a very special song for us from the musical " Falsettos". Ladies and gentlemen, Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova. With the cheer of the crowd, the spotlight on her face and the familiar squeeze of the arm from her now wife Trixie Mattel knew that auditioning for " Falsettos" was the best decision she'd ever make. After all it led to her and her lover always singing in duet with each other.  
" Who'd believe that we two  
Would end up as lovers?"


End file.
